6 Important AD Wedding Preparations Which Are Often Neglected

When it comes to our wedding actual day, AD for short, there are just so many logistics and details which we want to settle. Afterall, this is our ONCE IN A LIFETIME PERFECT WEDDING.

You know what? That's just common. So for your wedding, BE DIFFERENT. Focus on these 6 important aspects and be assured that your guests will remember your wedding as the union between you and your spouse (and not just about your dessert bar or live band or giant LOVE on the stage).

1) Wedding invites

If you are expecting more than a hundred guests for your wedding, you need to allocate alot of time to contact your guests and clarify their contact details. And yes, you will be crazy about doing it.

LIKE SERIOUSLY... Why can't my guests JUST APPEAR AS PER I WANT THEM TO!!!!!!!!!!????
GIF from: http://giphy.com/

What To Take Note?

-Your wedding invite is the first point of contact with your guests. Putting in effort in every invite is a sign of sincerity and respect for your guests.
-Here are some points to note when doing the invites:
1) Ensure that the person writing the invites have a pretty handwriting.
2) Take time to find out the names of your guests... and their CORRECT SPELLING.
3) If you are writing for your relatives, use salutation such as "uncle" or "aunt".
4) Ensure that they are mailed out or emailed out on time.
5) Contact your guests to confirm a RSVP and check on their diet preferences. Never assume that your guests are coming just because you have sent the invite.
6) One week prior to the AD event, make a second contact to confirm their attendance. This will also double up as a gentle reminder.
- NEVER try to contact all your guests within the same day. You will feel frustrated about it. Attempt to contact about 10-15 guests daily.
-We will usually face an attrition rate of about 15% to 20% in our wedding guests. Therefore, it is okay to invite at least 20 % more people than the no.of confirmed pax you have made.
-Never get too many confirmed tables just because it offers you a better discount or perks. It would mean a loss when you cannot meet the minimum number of confirmed tables.


WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?

  • Knowing the number of guests, as accurate as possible, helps you to plan the seating arrangement appropriately such that you reduce your losses to the minimum.
  • If you inform your guests about your wedding on a very last minute basis, your guests may feel like they are back-ups who are being called to fill up the dropouts. Nobody likes that. 
  • Many people now book their holidays way way wayyyyy in advance. Therefore, it is just courtesy if we can let them know as early as we can so they can block out those dates.
  • Your wedding invite is also a hint to your guests on the type of weddings they are invited to - be it sit down banquet, casual buffet line or a high tea reception. This directly affects the amount of money they will be putting in their angpow.

2) Seating arrangements

This is basically how I am when I'm doing the seating arrangements for my own wedding. Its really....FRUSTRATINGGGGGGG..

Image from http://giphy.com/
I am almost in a state of denial and just wishing that things will be perfect without me bothering about it at all.

What To Take Note?

-Seating arrangements is not just about grouping 10 people together in a table. Remember, your guests needs to sit and eat with this table of people for 3 hours. If they are going to be uncomfortable, it's either they won't stay long or they will throw you a very black face. Both options are not desirable on your big day.
-It is true that seating arrangements will always change because of last minute attrition. However, it is false to say that we should leave this planning to the last just because it is always changing. For our banquet, we started planning one month ahead. We spent many days adjusting it bit by bit. Till the wedding day itself, it is still changing but at least we have a clearer idea on how to go about with it.
-There will always be guests who cannot confirm their attendance, even up to the last 2 weeks. My suggestion is to inform these guests that seats are limited and we will have to assume they are not coming, aka no seat will be reserved.
-For family seating : So before you assume that your Eldest Aunt will definitely be ok sitting with Second Eldest Aunt, you better think again. My advice will be to consult your parents to understand the dynamics of the extended family member before allocating the seats accordingly.
-For friends' and colleague's seating: Take special attention to prevent issues such as awkward reunions of ex-couples etc.
P.S. I will try to do a more detailed post on this soon because this is a whole new chapter altogether.

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?

  • Good planning in seating arrangements helps your guests to feel comfortable during the entire reception. Afterall, during the wedding, we will not have much time to talk to our guests. So arranging for them to sit with common friends creates opportunities for catching up or possibilities of new friendships
  • If you are not convinced by the above reason, the second also-very-important reason is that a good seating plan will help you to reduce your losses. This is important for banquet seating, especially if you are expecting friends or families with special diets. 

3) Accessibility of Location

One of the main reasons why we opted for Intercontinental Singapore is due to its accessibility. This comes from a few first hand experiences of attending weddings at inaccessible places.

I know right...
GIF from: http://giphy.com

What To Take Note?

-Your guests need to travel to the wedding location. Therefore, while exclusivity of location sounds cool, accessibility places a higher priority.
-Ensure that your wedding location is easy to find and accessible by public transport. It would be most ideal if the location is centrally located in Singapore.
-If an exclusive venue is inevitable, give ample instructions to your guests prior to the wedding. It would be helpful if you attached a map, which is drawn to scale, with noticeable landmarks and directions!
-Arrange for scheduled shuttle bus for wedding venues which are very difficult to access, even with public transport. If it takes about 15 minutes of walking from the nearest mrt station, that place definitely needs a shuttle bus. Examples: hotels inside Sentosa, Orchid Country Club, Rochester park, Rider's Cafe etc. Although this means additional costs on your side, but it will prove to be a worthy investment.

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?

  • Most of the time, we often hear about cases whereby guests are late, cant find the place or gave up finding the location because they find it inconvenient. This is all too common because to be fair, not everyone has a car or wants to spend money on a taxi.
  • While a walking distance of 10-15 minutes sounds doable, it is usually considered a long long distance for guests who are dressed up in their formal attire. It's torturous for female guests who are all dressed up in their 5 inches killer heels. Afterall, no one will not like the idea of feeling sweaty even before they reach the wedding venue.

4) Schedule for the day

If you hope that everything is going to run smoothly, then please spend time to work on the schedule of the day. This may mean hours and hours on the computer... but trust me, it's so going to make your actual day great!

GIF from: http://giphy.com/

What To Take Note?

-One month before the actual day, call up the different wedding vendors which you have engaged to confirm the timings and the types of services or items. Check with the wedding vendors, especially your MUA, photographer and videographer, on the approximate time they require so that it falls in line with your proposed schedule. Never to just assume!
-The schedule has to be as detailed as possible but not cramped with too many details. Making a 20 pages schedule is just horrendous. (I may sound exaggerated but I have seen a 22 pages schedule before. To be honest, I never finished reading it myself.) It can be overwhelming! My final schedule was just 3 pages long.
-Ensure that there are enough briefing done to your helpers so that they are clear on their roles. Never assume that they are experienced 'brother' or 'sister' and that everything will be okay. Go through the schedule with them face to face to address any clarifications.
-Run through the schedule together with your partner and imagine it happening on the day itself, taking into consideration factors like traffic jams, travelling time, selfie moments with families and friends etc.
-Send everyone a copy of the final schedule.


WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?


  • In my preparation process, I have heard about how some couples spent so much money to pump up their wedding. However their wedding still ended up in a big flop just because the wedding helpers were like big sotongs. Or the photographer forgot to turn up and no one remembered to remind him. It is common to hear brides crying on the wedding day or after the wedding. Not because they are so touched, but because they are so frustrated that things are not going "as per planned".
  • Our wedding helpers are busy too, with their own lives. Our wedding is not their full time job. So, we cannot expect too much. Always remember to give them realistic and manageable tasks to avoid disappointments.


5) Food tasting

What To Take Note?

-Food tasting is basically your only chance to taste your banquet food before your guests. 
-Usually hotels and restaurants will offer a 10 pax food tasting session. These 10 pax usually includes groom's parents and bride's parents together with any siblings or close family friend. For many couples, this could be the first time both sides of the family are seated down for a meal together. Thus we may try not to be bitchy and picky about the food. In fact, it feels embarrassing to be criticizing about small details.
-However, the only one way go about with food tasting is : BE IN CONTROL AND BE HONEST ABOUT IT! 
If the food is not plated nicely, say it's not nice. 
If its too salty for your liking, tell the chef. 
If portion is too small, get the hotel staff to increase.
If this dish is not to the family's liking, ask for an alternative dish and get the chef to whip up the alternative dish for your tasting.
-Remember to always check with parents from both sides to ensure that everyone is pleased with every single dish! But ultimately, the couple makes the final call!

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?

  • Remember the bride and groom are the hosts for a wedding event. Therefore by being honest and requesting for reasonable improvements and changes, it is caring for your guests' tastebuds and keeping the hotel's food in check.
  • Many years down the road, most guests do not remember details like how nicely decorated your wedding hall is or how beautiful your gown is. BUT they will remember how your food taste like. The topic of the banquet food will spring up at random moments and even family gatherings. You don't want to jeopardize that.
  • This is especially prominent for wedding banquets, whereby guests have higher expectations towards the kind of food they will be served. 

6) Marriage Vows

All of us wish for that perfect moment we often see on tv or at weddings. The bride or groom hear each other vows and cried because they are so touched!!!!!!!!!!

GIF from http://giphy.com

I wish for that too... But in order for that to happen, you need to do some preparation work!

What To Take Note?

-NORMALLY, we will not be able to come up with a perfect marriage vow immediately. In fact, we are so caught up with the preparations that we may just overlook it.
-The JP will usually give you some sample templates. Or you can also search online for many wonderful marriage vows that best fits you.
-I choose to write my own marriage vow because I prefer it to be something that's unique and personalized. It took me at least a few hours to pen down what kind of promise which I want to give to this marriage. 
-The challenge is making sure my wedding vow is concise and not too LOR SOR. I intentionally avoided complicated words because I don't want a situation whereby he doesn't understand what I mean or I get the pronunciation wrong. Haha!

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?

  • Although action speaks louder than words, we cannot deny that WORDS is 1 of the 5 love languages for us to express our affection to the other party. So never take this lightly.
  • During a marriage, there will be ups and downs. At times when it's down, we fall back upon the vows which we have made to one another as a reminder of what we have promised. Thus the words that we say are very important.
  • If we use bombastic or unrealistic statements, it will set the marriage in an unrealistic direction. For example, a simple statement like "I promise that my money is your money and your money is your money." may sound humorous. But if you cannot see yourself giving all your money to the other party, my take is don't make such a statement. Another classic example, "I will always be that perfect husband / wife whom you want me to be." We need to be frank and upright about it. Our partner may have an ideal partner and we may not be that perfect person. So I rather you emphasize that you will always give your 100 % to this marriage.

Do share these wise knowledge with your family and friends who are preparing for their wedding! =)

Love,
Mrs OOPS

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

过大礼 Guo Da Li : All you need to know about Betrothal Gifts

[ Project Xi Bing ] Gin Thye Cake House, Thye Lee Confectionery, Neo Kian Guan Confectionery & Cake (Part 1/3)

TOP 7 Must-Eat in Feng Jia Night Market (逢甲夜市7大必吃) !!!